Wait, what?

I'm Jeff. I hail from The Sooner State and only occasionally miss the waving wheat. Right now, I'm living in Chicago and working as an in-house substitute teacher in one of the city's best schools. This is my face. I have a strange obsession with pens. I also love graphic tees a little too much. I will never be too old for Batman, zombies, or robots. I'm a sucker for a pretty smile, and a bat of the eyelashes will make me agree to just about anything. My friends are probably cooler than yours.

I need a coffee/adrenaline shot straight to the heart

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So close, Vanessa.

“Bye, Mr. Watkins! Have a well day!”

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yesterdaybells:

How is atheism even a thing?

How could it not be a thing? You don’t have to prove a negative.

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dresdencodak:

A livestream sketch I did earlier of Nightcrawler. I wanted him to look a bit creepier, but also maintain some devilish qualities. What makes him most fun, visually, is his fascination with swashbuckling, so I wanted to really emphasize that component of his personality.  It also felt appropriate to base his hair off Errol Flynn.

This will eventually be part of my re-imagining of the X-Men, similar to my take on the Justice League. Not any time soon, though, I’m busy!

Bah! Dresden Codak did my suggestion!

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PLEASE GOD IF YOU DON’T DO NIGHTCRAWLER I WILL DIE.

(Source: dresdencodak)

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QUICK! What the hell rhymes with aneurysm?!

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“Statistically, one of us in this room is Chinese.”
My brother, while I was home for winter break.
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Abortion in the United States

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scott-:

I am George Costanza.

scott-:

I am George Costanza.

(Source: pawneeharvestfestival)

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6 Absurd Situations that Only Happen in Food Commercials
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It’s thoughts like these that keep my mom up at night:

Hey guys -

I went to the dentist yesterday and we were talking about Sonicaires. The dental assistant said the Sonicaire representative was there recently and reiterated the importance of using the Sonicaire with a very gentle touch - kinda like holding a flute - or else it is designed to not work properly and will not vibrate like it’s suppose to. Just thought I’d pass that piece of advice along. Hope you’ve figured out to take the brush off every once in awhile to clean off the stuff that accumulates between the brush and unit.

HOPE ALL 3 OF YOU HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND !!!

Love ya -

Mom

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(Source: apriki)

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shortformblog:

mashable:

“Because the biggest producers of content on the Internet are not Google and Yahoo — they’re us – we’re the ones getting policed. The real threat to the enactment of PIPA and SOPA is our ability to share things with one another.”

-Clay Shirky, in his “emergency” TED talk about SOPA and why it would create a “consumption-only Internet.”

Watch this, all. “The threat is this inversion of proof.”

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Heaven for the Weather- The Streets

Currently on repeat.

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fwarg asked: absolutely not. although, no matter how curious your drunk/high mind is, never go for the Pesto. oh god. never the pesto.

I’ve heard bad things about Pesto. I’m glad that you’re able to verify that for me. As for now, I’ll stick to what I know. I miss living in Lakeview though; I had so many choices in pizza up there.

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